Are you following rules? Or are you following brules? (Bullshit rules)

As a lifestyle coach, I work with peoples’ personal goals on a daily basis. Goals. That word can be as inspirational to some people as anxiety creating to others. When I first started identifying my very goals, I couldn’t tell if they were my own or created by the culture in which I have grown up. I bet many of you can relate to that; pressure or expectations from others and society can easily merge with ones own goals until you cannot tell them apart. If you were even given a chance to create your own dreams in the first place.

Lovelies, I am so happy to share the video below with you. Vishen Lakhiani, founder of Mindvalley University, is sharing some invaluable advise on how to go about when setting your life goals, your end goals. He is also speaking about the traps most of us end up in:

  • Following the brules (the bullshit rules created by our own culture)
  • Focusing on “means goals”.

In short, means goals are goals such as “graduating college with good grades” or “earning a 6-figure income”. Why are they not end goals? Because they lead to the actual goals, the end goals. “I want to graduate college so that I can go to a job I love every morning.” The latter part of the sentence would be your end goal. Another example: how many times have you heard “For 10 years, I kept working up the corporate ladder until I finally reached my goal, but I realized I was miserable.” In my reality, that person kept fighting for a means goal without knowing the end goal. If he knew his end goal, maybe he would have made different kinds of decisions along the way to stay content, maybe he wouldn’t have gone for it at all. Maybe he was following the brules that say that success only comes from achievement.

I love this idea, but what exactly are these end goals I keep blabbing on about? To define them, Vishen Lakhiani calls on us to ask ourselves these three questions:

  • What experiences do I want to have?
  • In order to reach this, how do I have to grow?
  • How can I give back?

Not only do we get the beautiful space to think about what we actually want to feel in life, but with end goals, it is easier to see how we have to grow. And how we can make decisions in life in alignment with our true values. So much more sustainable. If you feel a lack of direction in life, this video might just be triggering something within you. Watch it for fuller explanations and get that clarity you seek.


This video has impacted the second month of my semi-online course tremendously. For more information about my course #FromDrainedToLiveWire, no obligations, email me to sign up for the newsletter.



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